Author Archives: Justin

The iPhone 4, monetarily speaking

The iPhone 4 is undeniably sexy, and I’m quite sure that I want one. But is it worth retiring my reliable, three-year old original iPhone in order to upgrade? On its face, all the features of iPhone 4 put my aging but unfailingly trusty iPhone to shame. A beautiful new design, the smokin’ A4 processor, [...]

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Quite offensive, quite hilarious

I may cringe at every episode featuring Peter, but there’s no denying that Family Guy—when it focuses on Stewie and Brian—is still effin’ hilarious. Case in point: the slightly-scared, slightly-concerned look of apprehension that Stewie is giving Brian, who’s projectile-vomiting after learning he had sex with a transsexual. That expression—the perfect combination of care, wavering [...]

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Tokyo Police Club’s “Breakneck Speed”

Newmarket, Ontario’s Tokyo Police Club may have hit the mainstream—or something very close to it—but fear not, indie lovers! The loss of indie obscurity alone isn’t enough to ruin this band’s appeal to any self-respecting indie rocker with a passion for catchy riffs, crafty vocals, and simple yet mysterious lyrics. I’m itching to see these [...]

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Targeted assassinations of U.S. citizens

Every passing day gives me another reason to be disappointed in our president and our government. Not, mind you, because Barack Obama too “liberal” or “socialist” or “fascist” or “communist” or any other nonsensical and insupportable-by-reality slur but because, quite to the contrary, he has ushered in what seems to me a stunted, overly-measured, carefully [...]

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Leif Vollebekk’s “Northernmost Eva Maria”

With unfortunate irregularity, an artist’s voice will melt together with instrumentation so perfectly that the results leave you clinging to the song, playback set to loop, for weeks on end. Leif Vollebekk’s song, “Northernmost Eva Maria,” from his latest album Inlands, is one such song. Vollebekk’s deep and intimate vocals, with a hint of warm, [...]

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Fallout 3, totes epic, is complete

Let it be known that on Saturday, February 6, at 2:47 AM ET, after weeks of thoroughly exploring each and every location in the entire Capital Wasteland; building a legendary reputation as the Hero of the Wastes; amassing tens of thousands of bottle caps and hundreds of top-quality armaments; destroying President Henry Eden and his [...]

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Immediate thoughts on Scott Brown’s election

I’m pretty pissed that my senator—a representative of Massachusetts, no less—supports torturing prisoners, opposes health care reform, opposes cap-and-trade, opposes gay marriage, opposes reproductive rights for women… We gave the Republicans eight years to run our country into the ground, and now we’re pissed at the Democrats because they haven’t fixed all the damage in [...]

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Patrick Watson’s “Big Bird In a Small Cage”

No introduction. Just listen: There was a house halfway ’round the world And I was invited in for a small taste of gin There was a hallway a thousand birds long But the biggest one of all was in a cage too small I asked the caretaker cuz he was the maker Looked at me [...]

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The Wooden Sky’s “The Late King Henry”

If this song doesn’t get your foot tapping, your hands clapping, and your voice at least a little bit sore, you may want to check your pulse. “The Late King Henry,” a lovely singalong tune by Toronto’s The Wooden Sky, deftly blends folk, country, and indie rock to make a song about as fun as [...]

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Hello, New York City!

I’m looking down, come help me up And stumbling around trying to fill my cup It’s half empty, been that way all my life So come pour some in and take me out tonight The sun is shining but we stay inside (oh, but we go out at night) We stay in looking for a [...]

Posted in Lyrics, Personal | Tagged , | 4 Comments