It’s a big house, but someone’s got to do it

I got lots of stuff done today. Scheduled some house maintenance with Physical Plant, contacted our house daddy (I don’t know the official term for the University staff member who oversees the houses), worked a full day at Help Desk, had some genuine bonding time with fellow Help Deskers, and got my bike’s brakes repaired. I also cleaned up the kitchen and unclogged a plugged toilet. Janet and I showed off the house on another tour and I invited people over for watermelon and freeze-pops after their movie, but I think I’m going to have to go to bed soon.

I have to wake up at 7:00 tomorrow morning, shower, and then it’s Dormstorm! All day, probably until at least midnight. Our job is to help freshmen set up their new computers and get them connected to the campus network. And in the process I’m going to talk to parents about the wonders of Apple, and maybe even chat it up with the cute new freshman girls. Word on the street is that there are some really hot Italian international students. But I have yet to see any.

I spilled a big cup of Coke all over me today, and my legs are still sticky from it.

The other night Janet and I had some people over the house—Joan, Emily, Jia, and Michelle—and we formulated a new, universal version of the baseball-as-a-sexual-metaphor system. Now there are definitive answers to what constitutes first, second, third, home, and a myriad of other baseball metaphors.

The best quotes to come out of that night, of course with no names attached:

• “Oral sex isn’t sex. It’s just a friendly present!”
• I’ve had sex dreams with short Mexican guys… and for a second, I was really turned on by that.”
• “It’s like a love triangle! Only the pitcher is out of the triangle.”
• “The floor was terrible. I slept maybe an hour that night. Plus, I gave my air mattress to Renee because I thought she was hot.”

Good night!